Here is our story. I find out i'm Pregnant with Twins, we're delighted and so excited. My due date is 2nd Nov 2009. On July 10th 2009 I started to have pains in my lower abdomen, I phoned the pregnancy assessment unit and they said to come to the labour ward at Derby. I stayed in overnight. The pains subsided and I’m discharged the next day with “unknown abdominal pain” A week later, I have a “show”, and abdominal pains again, I go back to hospital, and taken to the maternity ward, I’m examined by a doctor and told my cervix is dilated 1-2cm. Shocks set in, I started to shake, they can’t come now it’s too early. I’m then taken to the labour ward and put on a drip to stop the contractions. I’m told that if I laboured, there was not enough staff on NICU to cope with delivery of such premature twins; therefore they had to phone round to find a hospital that could take me. I went in an emergency ambulance that night to Stoke hospital and taken to their labour ward. I stayed on the drip for 24 hours and then the contractions stopped. I was taken to the maternity ward there and stayed with them for 14 days. I was then told that as I had stabilised they would try and get me back to Derby. I went back to Derby on Tuesday 28th July in an intensive care ambulance (very bumpy ride) I went onto the maternity ward at Derby. Approx 12.00am on 30th July I started with contractions again this time they were different, stronger. At 12.30am 30th July I was taken to the labour ward. With no pain relief my twins were delivered, 2.20am Charlie Andrew was born (Charlie after my Grandpa and Andrew after my Dad) Charlie weighing 1lb 15oz and 2.30am James Larry was born (James is Johns middle name and Larry is Johns Dads name) James weighing 2lb 1oz. They were both whisked away to NICU. We didn’t see them until app 5.30am, we went to the unit and I just cried, to see your babies with wires and monitors and a machine helping them breathe was horrendous, not being able to hold them was the most painful thing I’ve experienced. App 3 days later (the Honeymoon period as quoted by a consultant) they both came off the ventilators and onto CPAP, Charlie stayed off for app 3 days, James only 24 hours. They both went back onto the ventilators after getting tired. It was as the doctors told us “a rollercoaster” of emotions, James got an infection and would be really poorly, then he would recover, Then Charlie would be poorly and so on. James kept getting bad infections and as Charlie got ready to come off the ventilator again James wasn’t ready. Charlie finally came off the ventilator for good and when onto CPAP again, going from strength to strength. James still wasn’t managing to breathe for himself and as time went on the infections he’d suffered had obviously taken their toll on his body. The consultants decided that an MRI scan was the next step to have a more in depth look at James’ brain activity; he had to be transferred to QMC in Nottingham for this procedure as Derby’s scan machine wasn’t able to take little babies in incubators. The results from this scan were that his brain was under developed and the infections he’d suffered had affected his development. On returning from Nottingham James suffered “fits” and he was given drugs to stop them, the emotions we all were suffering just can’t be put into words. Usually the consultants like to get babies off the ventilators before 7 weeks. It was 10 weeks and James was still on the ventilator. As James was such a fighter the consultants wanted to give him a chance, and on advice from the consultants it was decided that we would take James off the ventilator and see if he would breathe for himself, and if he didn’t to let him pass away. So on October 13th 2009 aged 2 months 14 days; James came off the ventilator and passed away in our arms. No words can describe the pain we felt that day and still feel today. I’ve cried everyday since they were born, because of how much we love our boys. I have to say how wonderful Derby NICU staff are, so dedicated so supportive, the day James passed away they couldn’t do enough for us, they feel like part of our family, we will never be able to thank them enough for everything they did for us as a family and are still doing with other families. I found it extremely hard to go back onto the unit after James passed away because all the fear I had for James transferred onto Charlie. All the hoping and praying for our boys felt like it had been in vain. As time went on Charlie got bigger and stronger. Charlie finally came home on Dec 14th, weighing 9lb 3oz; he’s still on oxygen but growing everyday. We'll never forget our brave little man, he'll stay in our hearts forever.